Communication Practices of Single Mothers in Carrying Out Their Dual Roles

The research aims to analyze the communication practices of single mothers in carrying out their dual roles. This research approach is a critical qualitative case study method. The research data were collected through in-depth interviews with a number of informants and participatory observation. The research results show that there are five interaction arenas of single mothers in carrying out their dual roles, i.e. with their household, fellow single mothers, women, men, and with the environment / community. Communication practices that they are carrying out are interpersonal, avoiding conflict when interacting with men, and messages that tend to be emphatic when interacting with the community. Therefore, communicating their dual roles is a necessity because single mothers are frequently confused when they have to choose between housewife and modest public / productive role or they try to balance both roles if they have a larger productive role.


I. INTRODUCTION
Dual roles are something that adult women usually do [1] [2] [3]. However, the dual roles are most clearly seen in women single parent [4] [5]. The position of women who carries out the dual roles leaves a number of problems ranging from the difficulty of sharing roles proportionally [6], stress and vulnerability at work [7], to the skewed viewpoints of society [8].
The facts show that the number of single parents in Indonesia has been increasing. The data on the percentage of households by province, residence area and gender of heads of household in the period of 2009-2019 [9] show that 84.54% are headed by men, both complete families (father, mother, children), or incomplete family (father and children). The remaining of 15.46% are families headed by women (an increase if compared to the previous year (2018) by 15.17%).
Putri et al., [10] argue that there are a number of reasons why women become heads of households while they are simultaneously carrying out the dual roles, i.e. 1) Women who are divorced / dead by their husbands, namely women are required to work hard to earn a living themselves and to support their households, replacing the role of their husbands, 2 ) A married woman, but the income is not sufficient for family needs because her husband is unemployed / has no income, is also disabled, 3) The woman is alone, but has to earn a living to replace her parents' position. father figure. Secondly, women who become single parents also experience economic problems, particularly if they do not work when they get married and they only rely on income from their husbands. When suddenly she loses a husband who has been supporting the economy of the single parent family and she does not have a fixed income nowadays, as a single parent she frequently faces economic difficulties.
The existence of a single mother who carrying out the dual roles will have an impact on the imbalance of family functions. Family life feels bland, full of stress, minimal interaction, lonely dialogue, discussion and exchange of ideas in the family [12] . This condition will lead to distant relationships among household members.
From the description at above, it is necessary to establish or create a model of communication practices that are harmonious and in harmony in household, single mothers and children and other household members. This harmonious communication will determine the closeness of the relationship between household members [13]. According to Wahidah [14], communication in the household is defined as openness to convey everything in the household, in terms of good and bad matters, and also preparing to solve every problem in the household in a patient, honest and open way. Furthremore, Kusuma [15] states that healthy communication is also open in which it is very necessary in maintaining a harmonious relationship between parents and children.
Communication in the households of single mother has a strategic position in maintaining bonds with children [16]. With open communication, children will see and assess their relationship with their parents. Yarosh et al. [17] argue that the main problem in the households of single mother is maintaining communication, related to children's activities and finding topics in conversation.
It occurs when the position of men as fathers in the households is vacant. Furthremore, mother take over the function of the head of household, so all domains in the household become the authority of the mother, including in terms of communication with children. Not only in the aspect of communication, the loss of the father's role in the household causes unbalanced parenting and shifts in the obligations of the father that a mother must bear. This means that as a single parent the mother has dual obligations in her household.
The difficult situation is seen in the households of single mother. Not only single mothers, but children also experience shocks and shifting relationships with their household due to the separation of their parents [18]. Children who are cared for by single mothers encounter more problems than those with complete parents due to the presence of a father and mother who are accompanying them [19]. Parenting for single mothers, both those who suffer and who die, also affects the psychological life of the children [20].
Based on the background at above, this research will investigate how communication practices of single mothers in carrying out their dual roles. The research objective was to analyze the communication practices carried out by single mothers.

II. METHOD
This research applies a critical qualitative approach. According to Liliweri [21], the critical paradigm departs from critical theories which aim to defend ideas that are ready to criticize and resolve social inequalities in the domination of power / in this matter, the power of the majority of society, i.e. men called patriarchal culture. Guba and Lincoln [22] state that in qualitative research, the focus of attention is at the general level with a variety of methods, interpretive and naturalist approaches to a research subject. Moreover, Moleong [23], the qualitative research intends to understand the phenomenon of research subjects by describing words and language in a special and natural scope through the use of natural methods.
The research method here is a single descriptive case study [24]. Furthermore, Yin mentions five important components that must be present in a case study, i.e.: 1) Research questions, 2) Proposition, 3) Unit of analysis, 4) Logic linking data and propositions, 5) Criteria for interpreting the findings. Finally, Stake [25] also states that case studies are used for specific case research, and it is expected that it can present a useful viewpoint on a problem for theoretical improvement. it means that if a case is examined deeply, investigated in detail, then the daily activities are solved. The selection of research informants was carriedd out purposively and snowball. The data collection techniques used here were in-depth interviews and participatory observation.

III. RESULT
This research will analyze how communication practices of single mothers when they are carrying out dual roles. The informants in this research have identified a number of issues relevant to their experience of communicating their dual roles (Table  1).  Interaction with household members  Interpersonal  Interaction with other single mothers  Interpersonal  Interaction with other women  Interpersonal  Interaction with men Emphatic messages and avoidance in interpersonal conflict Interaction with environment and public Emphatic messages tend to focus on problems and do not "patronize"

Interaction Arena Communication Practices
When communicating dual roles to their household members, fellow single mothers or fellow women, the informants practiced interpersonal communication. This interpersonal communication aims to familiarize the interaction and therefore, it creates a positive impression of the status of single mothers who are carrying out dual roles without neglecting their status as mothers, for example in child care. The informant Wn stated: "At least if we want to go sleep, we take the time to tell stories. It is definitely really a good mother ... It likes that. After telling stories, we feed the food when children eat like that. It is definitely the tasks of a real mother. Otherwise, if about the function of father he teaches us more about how to get out. It is like that." Wn also said that 'establishing communication with household members is an important aspect in carrying out dual roles'. This is because, she said, as a mother, she still prioritizes communication with her children as part of "an effort to provide understanding to the household members about the position currently held by the mother".
However, not all informants felt the need to clearly communicate dual roles to their families. The informant Im has pointed out that when carrying out dual roles, the oint we have to have is honesty to acknowledge the status which for some people is stigmatic. She said: "Yes, it is like that the honesty means that what we must do anything honestly. What I mean that we try to be honest not to do such things (negative things) firstly to ourselves. We must be honest with outselves, for example ... 'with the status of widow', we know the meaning of 'widow' word'. " Therefore, for the informant Im, because she is not an extrovert woman, communicating her dual roles is best 'exemplified through deeds' rather than through words which actually stimulate misunderstanding in her household, among the household members and outside her household. For their households, interpersonal communication is the best choice with "more polite messages" while for outside of their households, the choice is interpersonal communication with "emphatic messages". Hy said: "Yes, for externals, we only see what the the case is ... if it is formal, if some ask me whether I am married or not, I will say it formally. It depends on the asking person I will definitely say that I am a single parent, a single mother." The informant Wd said the message she wants to convey regarding the status of single mother and her dual roles is that the position of a single mother is something that she must be carried out at this time, so complaining is not a way out. She said: "The message is more that I have to carry out it. That the point ... Enjoy it. Live with it. Be grateful with it. So the point is that we do not make any complaint. At the time ... the message was already that. This is what we have to live with it at this time. So don't make any complaint ... because there is a time for everything. " The informant Wn also states the same thing. According to the informant, currently the stigma against single mothers is so strong. Therefore, it is necessary to prove that this stigma is unusual. Wn stated: "Well, what we needs is to prove it, my sister. The proof is how we behave, how we can be accepted among them ... It is the point. So it's okay ... for example in the social regular gathering of heads of household, I will say that there is no head of household in my household, but I live in the community. I am a member of the community, I have to know the activities in my environment. It also prevails for my children. "